4 Ways To Not Make Friends As An Adult

Lessons on making friends by learning how to not make them.


I grew up around the time where technology was on the brink of being spread out to the general public. Back then, the world felt simpler and closed off. You spoke to people within your own circle, you got news from the radio or TV. If you wanted to find a date (or a one-night stand) you went to a bar or pub.

Technology has opened up a huge world of possibilities, but also a series of problems. From misinformation to harming other people anonymously without any sign of punishment involved aside from angry comments, the list can go on for some time.

But one thing I’ve noticed especially is how we form connections and make friends.

When I was younger, friends to me were people you spent time with during break times and after school. If you spent enough time with them, it was assumed you’re friends.

But friendship is more complicated than that. That much is clear once the internet came along and research was being posted online and is continuously expanding ever since then.

Friend relationships are just as crucial as family ties.

Seriously, you need friends in your life.

But only half of your friends genuinely like you.

Indeed, friendship is important but there is a growing concern based on that third bit of research. Ironically, part of the issue is the internet, specifically social media.

As I’ve been thinking back on my own relationships, there are only a small amount of people I can count as my friends. That said, I have no idea if these are the types of friends who would give me words of encouragement when I’m down, be a voice of reason when I’m contemplating something or that I’m wrong, or be a genuine friend. Not to mention give me the opportunity to do these same things in return. The only person I can say with confidence in doing that is family members — especially one of my cousins whom I live with.

But that’s kind of a given in the case of one having relatives you can get along with.

Outside of that circle is a whole other thing and I can’t say with confidence how to navigate…



Eric S Burdon

Entrepreneur, positive-minded. I used to say a lot, but now I do a lot.