As someone who struggled in social settings, I really get that to some degree. Although people weren’t talking behind my back (or perhaps I was completely oblivious to it) I’d still probably let people stomp all over me a long time ago. I know at the very least that I stomped on myself a lot in the past.
Now I know better than to hide emotions, and often times I find myself taking a calm and rational approach to problems or mistakes. For years now I haven’t needed to yell at people or get angry so honestly I don’t know where my boundaries are.
Either way it’s amazing that you are taking time to learn and grow in social settings. It’s tough for sure, but it’ll all be worth it the more you keep pushing yourself! :)