I made a commitment last week to be watching and engaging with other people in the Youtube world. Particularly people in my own niche. This is important as I stumbled upon a Youtuber by the name of Godzdesign (her real name is Patricia) and she had a great video about fake people.
It really got me thinking a lot about my life in the past, but also why people choose to be fake.
No doubt there are many people out there that are like this. They need to have the latest perfume/cologne, follow the latest fashion trends and so on. Me I only follow the latest hair trends whenever I get a haircut once every 4 months because I like short hair.
Anyway, unlike me, many people do those particular things for the belief that they need to look, act, or smell this particular way to be accepted. They believe in that so deeply they will do anything to be on top of the trends and follow suit.
That is just wrong!
Fitting in for the sake of fitting in is wrong. Period.
It’s been roughly six years now since I’ve started this journey of growth and discovery of myself. Looking back at my life I can say it was a mess. I’m happy I’ve gone through so much, but it was still tough. What’s even worse is there are still people who haven’t even gone through what I have gone through. People are still acting a certain way and wearing certain clothes so they feel they fit in.
I was a very quiet individual. The thought I’d be on Youtube, owner of a blog, and an author would give me shivers back then.
I wouldn’t say I was following the latest trends to try and fit in. I was simply there, existing. Nothing but a shell of a boy with no actual thoughts. I did what I was told and nothing more.
Even though I really wasn’t looking to be accepted or wanted, I can still relate to people who do things just to be accepted. They too are shells, following the latest trends and not building up their authentic self. We lost our authenticity and replaced it with something. For them it’s following the latest fashion trends, for me it was sheer emptiness.
So why do people do this?
I hinted at it a little bit and I believe people do this for the sole purpose that this is what they are fed. Remember that communities, parents, friends, other family members influence our perspectives.
Everything we are exposed to changes our way of thinking when we allow it. Even social media and the media in general. It’s why some men and women aim to have the figures that they see on magazines.
But at the end of the day, how we consume media stems from the environment that we are in. In essence our family and social life form a variety of beliefs that are then accepted by us. It’s why in my life I decided to pursue accounting. My parents suggested it and after taking a course I enjoyed it. Since I didn’t have anything else, I decided to pursue that. Today I love writing and talking about positivity because I took the time to explore myself and pause.
Which brings me to what can you do about this.
Many people struggle a lot through this. There are young people, people my age and maybe even older people who are working on trying to fit in by adopting trends, thoughts, beliefs and more. It’s insane! Personally, the best thing to do with remedying that is to take a look at yourself.
Pause and Enrich Your Life
I realized there was a problem with myself when I was 18 years old and I didn’t take it seriously until the year after that. I did that by pausing and looking at my life.
At the time I was fortunate to be around people with different backgrounds and ethnicity. It helped me a little bit in enriching my life, understanding that people are in fact different.
You can also enrich your life through reading more books, attending events. In general be involved in things and talk to people.
Take the Time For Self Discovery
After you expand your network or attend events, take the time to explore yourself. Ask yourself your genuine thoughts on certain things. What lessons did you learn? Would you see this person again or attend that event again and why?
Draw the answers out and formulate an opinion with them and shift your perspective when necessary.
Take the time to pause and look at the world around us and have an open mind to the world. There are many things we can discover about ourselves.
In the end, bit by bit, you can find your genuine self and a group of people that will appreciate you.
Even though every person is different, we still find ways to form groups and bonds to be accepted by others. You don’t need to be wearing the latest shoes or clothing or be part of the latest trend to fit in.
You wear those shoes or clothing because you genuinely like paying for overpriced things.
And that’s alright.
To your growth!
Eric S Burdon