When I first went to the gym, I had a good friend helping me out and training me. But one thing that I was quick to notice was his expression when working out. Mind you when you are working out your face looks pretty screwed up to begin with, but his looked a lot angrier.
Later on during that session he was asking me why I wanted to get healthier. Why I was going to the gym to begin with? He shared me his reason: he used to be picked on when he was little. And it really pissed him off.
Some of our greatest strengths and motivators come from things we hate
No doubt anger is one of the strongest emotions that we struggle to control. But we can also get immediate and great results. It’s why clickbait titles and even fake news gained popularity. Even though we are more conscious about it now, still it goes to show one thing.
Your reason for doing something, your why, doesn’t have to be some lofty ambition. It could easily be something that you dislike about yourself and you want to be better.
As humans, we thrive off of negativity
Some of the most devastating things in our lives can also be the main source of our own growth. My book, The Shy Boy I Once Knew, began from facing a trivial problem that started this entire journey that I am on. I wouldn’t be where I am today, doing what I’m doing without that.
And I know I am not the only one. A lot of people still cling to those kinds of reasons as motivators. Though I moved on to various other motivators, I can still understand why others stay there.
Negativity can be used to grow positively when used correctly
Like my friend, he turned being picked on as a source of motivating himself to work out. He’s working out because he doesn’t want to be in that kind of position any longer. I know he’s working out constructively the same way that I’m exercising constructively as well.
But obviously there are some individuals who use negativity to grow in a negative way. It took me a really long time to go to the gym because I talked down to myself. I convinced myself I would get laughed at or picked on if I showed up.
For others it may be to prove other people wrong. They are improving themselves just to prove a point and then stop. I feel in those kinds of cases you don’t get as much satisfaction. You’re pursuing something for revenge and once you get it you’re left with a question: what are you going to do next?
In the end, grow and improve for yourself
I believe the only way to get out of that negative cycle is to improve yourself for you. Whether it’s something for business, or health, or whatever, I believe it’s important to motivate yourself solely because you want to go ahead with this.
Again the motivator can be something negative or positive. And as you continue to grow and improve, that can change. As long as you are motivated and have a longing to improve yourself for you, you will surly grow faster!
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